Why I'm Not Afraid of Clowns

The Christmas season is now in full swing, with retailers and manufactuers pitching all manner of toys and games at budding consumers and their parents.

When I was a boy our family didn't have a lot of money. My parents worked hard and the kids were well cared for, but discretionary income for toys didn't come easy, so we really appreciated every one we had. I remember my Jack-In-the-Box the best. It was second-hand and didn't play most of the song when you turned the handle, but I was young and didn't know any better.

I'd sit there and crank away,

All around the mul...
...ed the weasel.
The monk...
Pop! goes th...

And when the top popped open out came... a spring. That's right, a spring. No happy-faced clown, just a spring. I loved my JITB, and I'd play with it for hours. Imagine my surprise watching my friend's baby sister playing with her JITB years later, "Hey! A Clown is supposed to pop out?"

Now that I think about it, this probably explains why I'm not afraid of clowns. I am however, terrified of springs.